“Sure you want another?”
“There are shtill more bottles to try. Wha’s that one?”
“I can’t tell, your arm is wobbly.”
“That… that… that one.”
“Let’s say you’re pointing at the butterscotch schnapps.”
“I’ll have that. Tall glass.”
“Sir, I can’t keep serving you like this. You’re going to hurt yourself. Also, other people here need service.”
“Did those other people fight off the prelimimury… preluminary… scout ship of an alien invasion? Did those other people run through laser fire to save a little girl? Did those other people set off the ship’s self-destruct thingie and get out just before it blew?”
“Whoa. Did you do that?”
“As far as you know.”
“Well… one more. And then I’m calling you an Uber.”
“Fair ‘nough. And no, didn’t do none of that cuz it would be classitified and couldn’t say nothin’ nohow. Made it all up.”
“No problem, chief. I hear a lot worse. Is that a burn mark on your cheek?”
“…”
“Sir?”
“Burned myself shaving. Make with the schnapps.”