Archive for the ‘Creating’ Category

And here’s my first entry into the 2009 Creative Writing Championship short story contest. Each group of writers was given a genre, a location that must be integral, an item that must be featured, 1,000 words to do it in, and 48 hours to write it. My group received “Suspense / indoor swimming pool / piggy bank.” Fair enough…

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Put Not Your Trust in Banks

by C. A. Bridges

He heard the terrible crashing sound, and the screams, and the rapidly approaching clatter.

Nestled deep in the darkness, the old stagecoach breathed a deep sigh and waited for the inevitable, which arrived moments later in a sudden slice of harsh white light.

“C-coach?” came the voice, sweet, high and shaking.

“Go away.”

The pig pushed her way into the closet and past the luggage to find him. “Coach! You have to help us!” She spun around to look behind her, making a noise like… there is no noise quite like a full piggy bank. She sloshed, metallically.

“It’s Christmas time, this is what happens,” he grumbled, and began to roll backwards to hide behind the shoes. “I’d advise closing your eyes. It’ll be over faster.”

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I won the audience award! You like me! (sniff) You were shamed, guilted, and/or pressured into admitting you really like me!

Thanks, everyone, for voting for me.

Didn’t get the judges’ prize but I did get into the top ten, which means I also won entry into NYCMidnight’s 2009 Creative Writing Contest, which starts this Friday night. Forget Father’s Day, kids, daddy has to get his write on.

The new contest is a bit different, and only slightly less complicated than a March Madness betting chart made with a Spirograph. It works on a points system.

Once again I’ll be in one of several writer groups. Starting this Friday night, we’ll be given a location that must be featured, an item that must be included, and a specific genre, and we’ll have 2 days to write a 1,000 word short story.

The judges will read them all, put them in order of preference and award points for our placement (#1 gets 25, #2 gets 22, etc). We get more locations, items, and genres and we write another 1,000 word story in July. Our points get added together, and the top 10 writers in each group move on to the next round.

We get reassigned to new groups, do it all over again in August, and the top ten from each group gets points but only five writers from each group move to the next round, based on the top three stories along with the next two highest point-total writers.

The last round is in September, all the writers left get a location, an object that must be in the story, and a genre. The judges choose the best 15, points get assigned, and then a variety of prizes get awarded to the top writers and the top points-holders. More details here.

Got all that? Me, neither. I plan to just write whenever they tell me to and see what happens. The prizes are decent, the challenge is a fun one, we get critiques on everything we write, and we get our own forum to tear each other apart help each other out.

I’ll keep you posted, whether you like it or not, and continue posting my stories here. So, heads up.

Remember NYCMidnight’s “Tweet Me a Story” contest? Hundreds of writers wrote stories of 140 characters or less, using a supplied word? And then some of the writers made it to the final round, and we all got the same word? And I posted my entries here?

One of them made the top 25, chosen by NYCMidnight’s judges, and now the final vote begins. So I’m shamelessly asking for votes.

Head to http://www.nycmidnight.com/2009/tweet/tweet.htm and vote for me (if you feel my story deserves it, of course). You can also vote for any other of the entries you like. No registration required, no e-mail, nothing. Mine’s the 4th one down:

“Aren’t you skydiving?” “Yup.” “You’re calling from midair? That’s sweet!” “I love you…” he said, watching the tear in the fabric spread. CREATED BY Chris Bridges

Voting ends Wednesday, 9pm EST. Thanks!

So, I made the final round of NYCMidnight’s “Tweet Me a Story” contest. So, the remaining writers all got the same word last night to use in our 140-character stories. So, the word was “tear.”

Here’s what I submitted, with titles added afterward for fun:

Last Call

“Aren’t you skydiving?”

“Yup.”

“You’re calling from midair? That’s sweet!”

“I love you…” he said, watching the tear in the fabric spread.

Father Knows Best

“But I loved him, daddy!”

“Wipe that tear away, honey. Other boys will respect you more.”

“How do you know?”

“Because they’ll see his body.”

Anything for You

“You said you were too happy to write tear jerking songs?”

“Yeah?”

“I just stole your truck to go sleep with your sister.”

“Oh, I love you!”

Interestingly, all of them are about love, one way or another. Noticed that after I submitted them. Here’s what I didn’t submit, and why.

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So NYCMidnight.com is holding a contest for writers to craft Twitter-sized stories of 140 characters or less, which must include a supplied word.

So all of the entrants were split into 20 groups, with a different word for each group, and we all wrote (my word was “heaven”).

So the first round now has been judged, and the best 15 stories of each group have been chosen, and now everyone gets to vote on their favorites out of each group.

And of the 15 chosen in my group, 2 of them are mine.

And now it’s time for you to vote. I’d appreciate it if you voted for mine (although there are some excellent competitors there). You can even vote for both of mine, if you’ve a mind to.

Go to the first round page and click on Group 1. Mine are the top two stories in the list, the ones by Chris Bridges. Vote!

Voting goes on till next Monday night. The writers of the 5 top stories of each group will go on to the finals, and I’d sure like to be there. I hear it’s nice. Thanks!

The first round of the “Tweet me a Story” writing contest from NYCmidnight was last night. Entrants were assigned a word at 7 p.m. and had 5 hours to come up with up to 3 stories, under 140 characters each, including that word in proper usage.

My group got the word “HEAVEN.” Here’s what I submitted (titles added for fun afterward, not included in submission):

SUBMISSION #1: “Watching the Fur Fly”"

“I don’t think ‘All Dogs Go to Heaven’ was a suggestion, Bill.”
“Just keep feeding me cartridges,” Bill said. “This is gonna take a while.”

SUBMISSION #2: “Sacrificial Yammering”

“What do you mean I can’t come in,” he said. “I gave up everything to get to heaven.”
“Exactly,” said St. Peter. “You’re too boring now.”

SUBMISSION #3: “Afterlife Is a Bitch, and Then You’re Dead”

Listen: Sometimes Heaven and Hell swap, as a lesson to the saved and damned souls alike.
Where will you go if you die tonight? Depends…

Granted, they’re more like scenes than actual beginning-middle-resolution stories, but those are a pain to cram into a tiny box.

On June 1st, 15 winning stories from each group get posted for online voting, and the winners progress to round two. I expect slavish, devoted voting for me from all of you.

That… was an excellent movie.

I’m about to go into detail, so don’t read on if you’re avoiding spoilers. Lots of them.

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Missed this when it came out, but some time back the folks at the SAMBA blog decided to see how tough it was to come up with new ideas for products or businesses, and offered them free to anyone who wants them. It’s worth skimming through just for the laughs or the “huh, why hasn’t somebody…” realizations. Some of the suggestions already exist in one form or another (which could be why one suggestion is for a service to tell you if your idea has been done; I smell some desperation there) but some are just inspired.

A church-issued credit card that automatically deducts your tithe? Movie theaters that display televised sports events on a 70-foot screen? A cellphone with a USB memory stick built in? In-grocery-store food prep that would chop your veggies while you shop? The notion of creating a portable drive-in theater with two semis (one to be the screen, the other to be ticket sales and concession) to go around showing independent movies appeals to me. And I would go for this one: “Rent a llama or goat to eat your front yard.”

A few display the thinker’s personal pet peeves, such as “A self cleaning microphone that never smells like breath or beer.” At least one contributor seems fascinated by the concept of having your stuff — cell phones, TVs, computers — smashed and returned to you as art, although I can’t tell if it’s from a love of art or hatred of electronics. Many of them are just suggestions for services that the suggester wants, like public nap stations and professional obituary writing and people to deliver the single 3/8″ nut you need for your repair job to your house. And some are just silly, such as “A place where you can go and pop bubble wrap. Possibly a bar of some sort.”

Of course, now that I said that someone will open a chain of “Popper’s” restaurants and make a fortune.

Some suggestions are illustrative of how the social interactions of the Web have changed how we think of things, such as the one that suggest a Web site that, for every product you buy, ships a mystery product to a friend for the cost of shipping and handling. Improve the economy and bewilder your friends! Win!

And some are just wrong, such as Nicocream, the nicotine ice cream. “Comfort food that helps you quit smoking (or addicts you to ice cream).”

But this one? “An application that you have your friends fill out that will compare against your answers and give you a compatibility score. In addition, tips about their personality.” Totally exists. It’s called “Facebook.”

Next time you get a free hour or five, check out “Hamster Burial Kits & 998 Other Business Ideas” from SAMBA. If ideas are a dime a dozen, here’s $8.35 worth to get you started.

It’s National Kazoo Day!

Please plan your activities accordingly, especially if you’re planning anything formal tonight. Remember, kazoos fit nicely into even the smallest purse or tux pocket, and nothing finishes off a romantic evening better (or more completely) than a kazoo.

This is also as good a time as any to mention the movement at kazooamerica.org to make the kazoo America’s National Instrument. This plucky music maker is an ideal choice for our national musical mascot. After all, it’s so democratic: anyone can play a kazoo successfully (for a given definition of “successfully”).

The movement has already made great strides with appearances on Late Night with Conan O’Brien, Fox and Friends, CBS Sunday Morning News, Martha Stewart, and has won approval from bemused and often bewildered politicians across the country.

So join the hordes of buzzing musicians and help us fight to honor this lowly instrumentby raising it to the level of national recognition. Wouldn’t you love to see President Obama playing the kazoo, possibly leading Congress into a rousing rendition of “America the Beautiful”? Some days, I can think of little else.

Sure, you want to send your Facebook buddies a beer or a bouquet or a box of chocolates or a plant or a pet or any of a zillion other virtual items available through the many Facebook gift-giving apps, but who can afford them?

Times are tough, and even free gifts might be too a little too much for your strained budget. Fortunately, I can help.

Depression Gifts allows you to send economy-appropriate presents to your friends. Pencils, apples, sticks, and more easy-to-afford items are available, with more coming. Your friends will appreciate the thought and your wallet will appreciate the break.

Depression Gifts. Available wherever lots of sad-looking people stand in line, in black and white.